What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

How do I stop someone from forcing/pestering me to become gay/bisexual when I already want to be straight?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Why don't younger men like older women?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Is Europe willing to risk losing its alliance with the United States, if they choose to continue the war in Ukraine?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Can I know a love story of a medical student?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Why is it that women are stronger than men nowadays?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

What does the Turkish word çıplak mean?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

What is the meaning of xx in texting?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Why do people turn a blind eye to bad behaviour if someone is very good looking? Whereas if someone is ugly, they get harshly judged for everything?

Make Nazis afraid again!

TEXT:

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Why do almost all vertebrates have tails, but not apes and frogs?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

If there was only one man remaining on the Earth, would this be regarded as extinction?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Why do you think Filipinos are conservatives?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …